The label “stay at home mom” is one that I do not consider accurately represents us women who are with our kids all day. I absolutely cringe every single time I hear it. Now I’m going to tell you why.
I’m a mom of two, and I consider myself incredibly blessed to have the opportunity to be with my kids, all day long. I’ve seen both ends of the working vs. stay at home spectrum. Being in my second (and last) marriage, I’ve done the single mom working, going to school, and taking care of my kids gig while going through my previous divorce. It was stressful and both physically and mentally exhausting. I know a lot of women who take on this challenge and they kick ass doing it. I envy them and have the utmost respect for those women, because I’ve been there. And it’s not easy.
That being said, for me personally, when given the choice, I chose to be at home with my kids. If you’re a mom like me, I’m sure you’ve been through the following scenario before. Someone asks you what you do for a living, and you inform them that you’re a stay at home mom. This sometimes is followed with a “oh, it must be nice to stay at home and do nothing all day” comment. I’ve had it said to me more than once. I feel like that label makes it appear as though that is what we do with our days at home. That perception of what I do hurts me down to the core, because I contribute so much more then that.
I am not a stay at home mom
I am a homemaker. My contributions to my household keep our days running smoothly. The laundry is done, dinner’s are made with love and mostly from scratch, and cleaning is done on a daily basis. My kindergartners school lunch is made every night before bed, clothes are set out,and baths and bedtime stories are given. My soldier can count on me to have clean uniforms and PT’s every day of the week.
Appointments are scheduled and kept up with, including those of our fur baby and our vehicles. The lawn gets mowed in the summer and sidewalks are shoveled in the winter. Interior design is not my forte, but I do my best to make our home feel comfortable and look nice by embarking on DIY projects. I save money every time I can by trying to use what I’ve got and using coupon apps. I am a homemaker, because I take our house, and make it a functioning home for my family to live comfortably in.
My soldier works hard every day for our family, and I love him dearly for all that he does for us. Just because my job is mostly contained to inside my house, that does not mean that I am any less valuable because of it.
I feel pride in the fact that I can make it so that when he gets home, he can relax and not worry about chores. I feel lucky to get to see my kids grow each and every day. Taking my daughter to school and picking her up is a task that makes me feel extremely lucky, because this is a life that I’ve always dreamed of. Some women grow up dreaming of owning companies or being CEO’s, I grew up dreaming of taking care of my family.
Major high fives to the men and women who take on these tasks whilst having a full-time out of the house job. They are taking on two full time jobs by doing so to give their families a good life. While we might all contribute to society and our families in different ways as women and men, not one of our jobs is more or less important then the others, including the jobs of us homemakers.